To escape the the bitter cold Philadelphia February, my good friend, roommate and epic cartoonist, Nicole DiPunchurface, and I fled south to Austin, Texas. We experience a ton of great people, food and fun times, but one of the most memorable things from this particular trip has to be playing Chicken Shit Bingo at Ginny’s Little Longhorns Saloon.
For 11 years worth of Sundays, Austin locals scurry up Burnet Road for a version of Bingo that involves some chicken feed, a chicken and some chicken poop. Here’s how the game is played: There’s a piece of plywood on a pool table that has a bunch of numbers on it. For $2 you get a ticket with a number on it that corresponds to a number on the table. Ginny unleashes the chicken and the crowd waits for it to poo on a number. Whoever’s number it unleashes the thunder upon is the person who wins some cold, hard cash!
The games begin at 5pm and end at 8pm, however, if you want to witness Chicken Shit Bingo for yourself, I advise you get there early. It’s not like you’ll be sitting around bored, there’s plenty of colorful characters for you to chat with, live music (hello – it’s Austin) and free hotdogs with all the fixin’s! And don’t forget to grab a beer or a plastic Budwiser cup full of wine!
It was one of the many times that Nicole and I experienced the true kindness and love of the Austin community. For a mere $6 each, we ate dinner (free hot dogs – hollah!), had some beer, bet on chicken poop and talked to some of the most interesting individuals Texas has to offer. Once Penny the chicken was set loose on the table, the bar’s full attention was focused on her rear-end. The excitement in the room intensified every time Penny stopped over a number and caused the crowd to gasp each time she wiggled her behind. While she was busy clucking about in her cage, feasting on her food, the bad played a loop of sweet country tunes to try and coax the chicken to do the deed. But after 20 minutes, the band took a beer break and the sound country music was replaced by cheering and chanting. When we reached the 30 minute mark, the crowd calmed down. Some began to ask Ginny how long it normally took for the chicken to crap while others debated over the chicken’s anatomy and how long its digestive tract might be. It took that chicken 42 minutes to take a dump, but it was 42 minutes of laughing, joking and mingling with our new friends. I could related to Ginny’s t-shirt, which read, “I like to start my week of shitty.” So if that is what Austin classifies as shitty, then I would start every week off shitty!
Here’s what it looked like!